NHPCO NewsLine Summer 2020 - 41
Patricia had a way of making me
do homework I should have
attended to in college; I once
again had to resort to Google to
brush up on what it was that
concerned Hamlet about the
after¬life. I did so later that day
and smiled, remembering how
several weeks earlier, she had
apologized for inadvertently
interrupting me when I was
handing out instructions to staff:
"You'd better watch out or I'll be
sitting in your seat soon," she
said. I was go¬ing to miss her.
For Shakespeare's forlorn hero,
the fact that we don't know what
lies beyond "when we have
shuffled off this mortal coil" is
what makes us stretch out our
suffering for so long. I suspect
that what kept Patricia hanging
on to life for as long as she did
despite mounting pain and her
exhortations to the contrary had
everything to do with love: of
family and of her research team
at Hospice Buffalo. I am also
grateful that her end of life
experiences helped bring her, one
of the most selfless human
beings I knew, back in touch with
her core self.
no longer speak and looked
unresponsive. I bent over and
asked her in a whisper if she'd
seen her mother, not truly
expecting an answer. She smiled,
nodded, and pointed upward.
Nothing was said and everything
was understood.
Christopher Kerr, MD, PhD,
is Chief Medical Officer &
Chief Executive Officer for
Hospice & Palliative Care
Buffalo, New York.
Learn more about Dr. Kerr's
keynote presentation for the
2020 Virtual Conference on
July 22, "Home Based Palliative
Care - from Outcomes to
Opportunities."
Patricia was
alternating
between fear of
the unknown and
a sense of defeat,
disguising both
under a veneer of
casualness she
did not truly feel.
Learn more about Dr. Kerr's
keynote presentation for the
Virtual Interdisciplinary
Conference in October,
"Validating Dreams and
Visions of the Dying."
On one of my last visits with
Patricia I asked her, "Who would
you want to see in your dreams
going forward?" even though I
already knew the answer. As
predicted, she replied, "I'd like to
see my mother because I never
got to know her."
I went to see Patricia one last
time before she died. She could
Newsline / Summer 2020
41
https://www.nhpco.org/speaker/christopher-kerr-md-2
https://www.nhpco.org/speaker/christopher-kerr-md/
https://www.nhpco.org/speaker/christopher-kerr-md/
NHPCO NewsLine Summer 2020
Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of NHPCO NewsLine Summer 2020
NHPCO NewsLine Summer 2020 - intro
NHPCO NewsLine Summer 2020 - 1
NHPCO NewsLine Summer 2020 - 2
NHPCO NewsLine Summer 2020 - 3
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