Talking Stick - May/June 2017 - 62

CONVERSATIONS
we can for our children. It's sometimes difficult to leave work at work
so that I can be fully present with my
daughter in the evenings.

Barile: I think so much depends on
the staff member's situation. I feel
more pressure to be involved at home
(attend a PTA meeting, be home for
dinner, attend a doctor's appointment),
and I think it also took a lot of time for
my partner to understand that my role
isn't 9-5. There is also a ton of pressure when something comes up with
our kids. During the day, I might have
meetings on my schedule with dining
staff or our finance team to evaluate
our budget, and it's hard to get those
folks back together in a room. Although I get no inclination that they'd
have any issue with parenting duties
taking priority, it's more of an internal
guilt on my end.

Brouillard-Bruce: Housing is a high
pressure environment in general. I've
come to find that having a child has
added an additional layer of pressure.
I'm also starting out in a new position and at a new university, so I am
balancing the normal pressures of
housing with the pressures of being
a new father as well as being invested
and involved in my new team. That
will require some more after-hour
meetings to get out and meet staff and
get the homework done to get caught
up to speed. Balancing all of that can
be a bit challenging. Fortunately, I
have a partner who is in the student
affairs/housing business as well, and
she knows what I am juggling, so she
can better evaluate just what might be
needed to support me, and vice versa.

Jerde: For me that pressure is balancing
my time at home and work and making
sure that my partner feels supported and
not like the sole caretaker. I also feel that
during certain times of the year it is hard
to justify staying home when something
at work is happening, but I know my
department is very supportive if I need
to be home.
62

TALKING STICK

TS: Is there a high rate of turnover in a department when more
people start seeing others having
kids and they leave for a unit that
has more single staff? Is it hard
to get single staff to stay within a
unit with many staff with kids?

their perspective, does it affect
productivity? What are some solutions?
Stone-Sewalish: I do believe it's on

though I also have seen fewer live-in
professionals with children. I have
seen departmental cultures that are
built around those with families and
perhaps those where it's not so much
the norm. Culture perpetuates itself. If
a department looks attractive to those
with kids, they're probably more likely
to apply. And therefore there would be
little turnover.

the staff to manage the dynamic between those with and without children,
not on the managers. While it's the
responsibility of a manager to build
and lead exceptional teams, they can't
manage every dynamic. In this case,
it's not about those with or without
children, it's about having a team that
can be honest with each other and build
relationships that allow for the work/
life blending that everyone needs to be
successful. Productivity (here defined as
service to students and one another) is
contingent upon how we work together.

Basilio-Murray: I could see how it

Basilio-Murray: Having a supervisor

would be difficult to join a staff as a
single person, when the majority of
your co-workers have families. Our
office is currently a 50/50 split of those
with/without children. Those without children spend time hanging out
together on the weekends or evenings,
while most of the staff with children
are at home.

with a child has been beneficial. He
understands when my daughter is sick
and offers advice and support when
I'm not sure what to do next. Having
a child has helped me to focus my energy in a more productive way. I try not
to take a lot of work home at night, so
it has forced me to utilize my time in a
more effective way during the business day. Having a child has changed
my outlook, and I find that I'm more
empathetic and can relate on a more
personal level to parents. That's been
really beneficial in my residential
education role.

Stone-Sewalish: I haven't seen this,

Jerde: Mmm, I have been on both
sides of this situation. At a former
institution, when I was single and
then married without kids, I felt my
free time wasn't valued like it was
for those with kids. I was often given
job responsibilities and holiday duty
because others had kids, and that
took precedence. So I could see single
people opting for places that had more
single staff and where the job responsibilities were possibly more evenly
distributed. Having said that, I believe
that it's up to supervisors to be aware
of and intentional about navigating
how staff are treated and how the
workload is distributed, but I also appreciate supervisors who understand
the challenges of being a good parent
and a good employee.
TS: How does management handle
this sentiment among staff? From

Barile: I think staff without children
(notice that I'm changing language
from single staff to staff without
children, because I think they are
two different types) often want to be
involved more often, and staff with
children want to be involved in both
sides of their work/life balance. I do
think managers sometimes think staff
with children are more long-term
natured, since particularly with schoolage children, moving is difficult. I've
witnessed managers not address a
staff member's concern because it was
unlikely they'd pick up their family to
move to a new job.
Talking Stick - May/June 2017

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