LK Test 2012 #1 - (Page audio)

Now that there is the Tec-9, a crappy spray gun from South Miami. This gun is advertised as the most popular gun in American crime. Do you believe that crap? It actually says that in the little book that comes with it: the most popular gun in American crime. Like they're actually proud of that crap. Well, the way they make shows is, they make one show. That show's called a pilot. Then they show that show to the people who make shows, and on the strength of that one show they decide if they're going to make more shows. Some pilots get picked and become television programs. Some don't, become nothing. She starred in one of the ones that became nothing. Now that we know who you are, I know who I am. I'm not a mistake! It all makes sense! In a comic, you know how you can tell who the arch-villain's going to be? He's the exact opposite of the hero. And most times they're friends, like you and me! I should've known way back when... You know why, David? Because of the kids. They called me Mr Glass. Do you see any Teletubbies in here? Do you see a slender plastic tag clipped to my shirt with my name printed on it? Do you see a little Asian child with a blank expression on his face sitting outside on a mechanical helicopter that shakes when you put quarters in it? No? Well, that's what you see at a toy store. And you must think you're in a toy store, because you're here shopping for an infant named Jeb. Look, just because I don't be givin' no man a foot massage don't make it right for Marsellus to throw Antwone into a glass motherfreakin' house, freakin' up the way the nigger talks. Motherfreaker do that crap to me, he better paralyze my ass, 'cause I'll kill the motherfreaker, know what I'm sayin'? My money's in that office, right? If she start giving me some bullcrap about it ain't there, and we got to go someplace else and get it, I'm gonna shoot you in the head then and there. Then I'm gonna shoot that bitch in the kneecaps, find out where my goddamn money is. She gonna tell me too. Hey, look at me when I'm talking to you, motherfreaker. You listen: we go in there, and that nigga Winston or anybody else is in there, you the first motherfreaker to get shot. You understand? You think water moves fast? You should see ice. It moves like it has a mind. Like it knows it killed the world once and got a taste for murder. After the avalanche, it took us a week to climb out. Now, I don't

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LK Test 2012 #1