Digital Dealer - April 2019 - 45

own way. When customers
perceive you to be different
from them, or how they'd
like to be, your message is
mute. After all, why would
anyone willingly listen to and
allow themselves to be led
by someone they don't even
like?
Make no mistake, influence begins when you align
with the person that you are
communicating with. This
means aligning your words,
your voice, and your body
language. You would never
communicate with your
best friend in the same way
that you communicate with
your boss, and you would
never communicate with a
colleague in the same way
that you communicate with a
toddler. In these situations,
you naturally adjust your
approach and your style so
that you can communicate
in a way that gets through
to them. Why should your
communication from one
customer to the next be any
different?
The best communicators
quickly identify which key
words and phrases most
resonate with their customers; they take special care
to speak in a tone, volume
and tempo that is most
pleasing to their customers;
and they create a sense of
familiarity and alliance with
their customers through the
proper use of body language. Most importantly, the
best communicators ensure
that their words, voice, and
body language are all congruent. You can't pretend to
be someone you're not. You
have to be yourself while
communicating in someone

else's "language."
Tailoring your style not
only puts you in a position to
have an influential conversation, but it is also the only
way to truly acknowledge,
respect, and enjoy the differences in people. Before you
can take your customers to
where you would like them
to go, you first have to meet
them where they are!

LAW 2: THEIR
FEELINGS DOMINATE
YOUR FACTS

You can be dead right, but
if your customer does not
feel that you are right, your
opportunity with that customer is as good as dead. It
is critical to listen beyond the
words, because sometimes
the words don't even matter!
Sadly, the number one
untrained skill in all of sales
is the ability to personally
connect with customers. It is
their feelings, not your facts,
that drive behavior. Without learning, leading, and
leveraging the feelings that
are really driving your customers, it would be impossible to have an influential
conversation.
Your customers are all led
by six emotional motives to
buy, and they are:
1. To feel important and
avoid feeling unimportant,
disregarded, or worthless.
2. To feel independent
and avoid feeling dependent
or powerless.
3. To feel responsible and
avoid feeling foolish, immoral, or feeble.
4. To feel rewarded and
avoid feeling deprived, disadvantaged, or failing.
5. To feel secure and
avoid feeling afraid, worried,

or uncertain.
6. To feel loved and avoid
feeling unvalued, unwanted,
or unwelcome.
It is important to note that
each customer experiences and responds to these
emotional motives to buy
differently. The strength and
influence of each depends
heavily upon the personal
values and past experiences
of each customer.
The best communicators want to make the deal
bigger and more meaningful
to their customers. They
skillfully skip the small talk
and ask really good personal questions. If you want to
bring value, add value, and
become a person of value,
you must first gain insight
into what really drives your
customers. Without empathy
you are flat-out handicapped
in getting through to others.
You will not be able influence what your customers
will do, until you first understand how they feel. Understanding which feelings are
influencing your customers,
allows you to frame your
solution so it not only makes
perfect sense, but so it is
also personally compelling.
You must remember that
your customers receive your
communication through their
lens, and their perception is
conditioned greatly by the
angle and position of your
message.
Whether you are trying
to secure an appointment,
gain a commitment, or close
a sale, your success will
be determined by what you
ask, what you say, and how
you act. It's the way that you
treat each customer, and the
D I G I TA L D E A L E R . C O M

way that you communicate
your value, that matters
most. By applying the first
law, "Your Style Trumps
Substance Initially," to your
communication, you can
become a trusted advisor
that your customers want to
engage with, connect with,
and listen to. By applying the
second law, "Their Feelings
Dominate Your Facts," to
your communication, you
can become a person of
insight who sees beyond the
words, gains the personal
edge, and creates value that
is personal, powerful and
unique.
Next month in Part 2 of
this article, I will help you
take advantage of the last
two remaining laws of influential conversations. You
will learn how to lean-in and
lead your customers, create
an environment of urgency,
and inspire action. Don't
just have a conversation
with your customers, have
an influential conversation.
Remember, the quickest
way to improve your results
is to improve the quality of
your communication!
MIKE HIRSCHFIELD is on a
mission to empower, equip, and
exalt sales and finance teams
everywhere! Mike has served in
both franchise and independent
dealer groups, leading teams
as large as 80+ to reach new
heights of achievement. He
teaches how to build personal
influence, become trusted
advisors and leverage personal
solutions that are aligned with
a customers' most powerful
buying motives. Mike empowers teams by developing their
ability to build connections and
lead customers to take action
and buy now! EMAIL:
Mike@FoundationToWin.com

APRIL 2019

45
http://www.DIGITALDEALER.COM
Digital Dealer - April 2019

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