GRAND Magazine- Winter 2021 - 16

play
Instead, researchers identify characteristics of play. I
find that the following characteristics occur most commonly in grandparent and grandchild play. Which ones in
this list describe your own experiences?
● Children and adults are having fun with one
another.
● They're focused and actively engaged.
● Their play is spontaneous, with no rigid rules.
● Their play is voluntary, with no need for reward.
They play because they want to, and either one can
decide to stop.
● For both children and adults, the process of playing
is more important than achieving a specific goal.
Play between grandparents and grandchildren is characterized by the fun we have and our delight in one
another. We take our cues from our grandchildren and
become attuned to what pleases them. Though we sometimes take the initiative, our purpose is mutual pleasure.
When our grandchildren grow older,
our play

becomes more truly mutual as they, in turn, learn what
delights us, makes us smile, and keeps us engaged.
When people play, they signal to each other that
" this is play. " With babies and toddlers, we often smile
and open our eyes wider. Especially among preschoolers and kindergartners, play often includes pretending.
Grandparents may notice that young grandchildren are
still learning the concept of rules and when they apply.
So when they play games, they can't yet follow defined
and fixed rules. For younger children, rules are flexible,
they may be forgotten, or new rules are declared: " No,
Grandma, now we play it this way! "
Another characteristic of play is the age difference
between the players. When we think of preschoolers,
school-aged children, or teenagers playing, we often
imagine them playing with friends their age. The most
common exception is play within families where we see
people
of different ages playing together. And, with
grandparent and grandchild play, the age
difference is usually the greatest.

We need to update our
repertoire of songs,
stories, books, and movie
plot lines, and definitely
update the names of
popular superheroes and
princesses.

16 GRAND

WINTER 2021

What might that mean for grandparents in terms of
what we play and how we play? To begin with, we have
to adapt our play styles to one another. For example, we
need to update our repertoire of songs, stories, books,
and movie plot lines, and definitely update the names of
popular superheroes and princesses.
I'm also keenly aware that while my grandchildren's
physical abilities are growing, my own abilities are declining. It's increasingly challenging to deal with the physical limitations I didn't have when my own children were
young - or even when my oldest grandchild, now 19,
was little.
All of us grandparents are learning to adapt to this
new situation. Sometimes I'm physically exhausted after
a day of taking care of two active grandchildren. Indeed,
one day at the park, after I'd spent a long time pushing
my then four-year-old granddaughter, Ava, on the swing,
I explained that I needed to rest a moment. Ava looked
up at me. " It's OK, Grandma, " she said patiently. " Take as
much time as you need. "

Click here to continue reading
Dr. Judith Van Hoorn, a professor emeritus of
education and psychology and a grandmother of four,
writes from both perspectives. Her understanding
of child development allows her
to delve deeply into all aspects
of young children's growth,
especially during the first five
years. The Gift of Play - How
Grandparents Enhance The
Lives of Young Children will be
available February 2021.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0994809700/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=grandmagazi0d-20&camp=1789&creative=9325&linkCode=as2&creativeASIN=0994809700&linkId=c0cf2342749a51234e00421ef2df453e https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003B6QYSW/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=grandmagazi0d-20&camp=1789&creative=9325&linkCode=as2&creativeASIN=B003B6QYSW&linkId=74a78ba0a510c9871c2e38f745d59213 https://www.grandmagazine.com/2021/01/play/

GRAND Magazine- Winter 2021

Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of GRAND Magazine- Winter 2021