Condo Media - September 2009 - 31

more thing has been taken from him. Or, it was only a letter telling a resident they weren’t allowed to wash their car in the driveway, but to that resident it’s one more thing being taken away (autonomy). It may not be rational (the resident knew the rules when he or she moved in), but rationality seems to be irrelevant these days. Your choice on how to react to residents when they are at their wits end can minimize adverse effect on everyone. Choose a reaction with grace. Yes, you are stressed out as well. Yes, you also may have the same or worse problems than that owner. But within your capacity as a manager, who must field those angry communications, you can choose to respond with grace — grace to give them all your attention (No emailing or texting at the same time); grace to provide feedback to them about their concerns, showing you heard and listened; and grace to follow up with a remedy. Are they angry? Yes, but you showed grace to understand where they are coming from, grace to forgive that anger, grace to allow yourself the breathing room and understanding not to be angry right back. such as your staff, the accounting department, your volunteer board or committee members, the landscaper and his crew, the grocery clerk, the flight attendant or your child’s teachers. You’ll find saying “thank you” becomes habit, and, frankly, it feels very good to thank others. You’ll find that a “thank you” attitude will come back to you from your residents, co-workers, contractors, friends and others as well. Gain Perspective “Old age may not give you wisdom but it will give you perspective,” noted Paul Harvey, an American radio broadcaster and syndicated commentator. For those of us born during the latter half of the 20th century in the United States, we have known prosperity beyond any which our parents and grandparents could have imagined in their childhoods. To many of us, the concept of The Great Depression is just that, a concept with little attachment to our reality. Likewise, many of us are woefully ignorant with the events leading up to and into World War I and II (watching Saving Private Ryan doesn’t count), and almost anything that happened prior to 1960. Our perspective and attention span, as a nation, is short. We must gain some historical perspective as to where we were 20, 40, 60, 80 or even 100 years ago to appreciate the economic ups and downs as course changes on a general upward trend. This is called perspective. Famed composer Ludwig Van Beethoven described it this way: “Music — The one incorporeal entrance into the higher world of knowledge which comprehends mankind but which mankind cannot comprehend.” This morning, I have been listening to Beethoven’s Piano Sonata #14, known as the Moonlight Sonata, completed by the composer in 1801. The music is timeless, and is as beautiful and moving to me now as I am sure it was to the first members of the Put Good Stuff Out There Now more than ever, it is important to remember that what you put out into the world will come back to you. Are you putting anger, frustration, incredulity, uncertainty, antagonism and exasperation into the world? These negative emotions will come back to you ten-fold, especially in our business where we in management are the “No!” police. Instead, choose to put joy out there even when you may not (yet) be feeling joy yourself. Start by giving back. Give back, and give first: Say “Thank you!” more often. Managers are not thanked very often, and as a result may tend to not thank others enough, especially when we feel overwhelmed by work. Even if you are never thanked for the hard work you do, say “thank you” to those who work hard, public who heard it 200 years ago, and those who will be hearing it 200 years from now. This is music that has and will endure far beyond my lifetime and that of my son, and his children. So when it may seem as if things are crumbling around us, it is comforting and wise to remember there are many enduring things in life, and that history has shown us they will be there tomorrow. Managers deal with much negativity during the course of a work day, more than most jobs. We take a lot of it in stride, accepting that it’s just what we do — we deal, and we move on. But as I spoke to one management firm owner, she said she felt the daily barrage of negative news on the economy just seemed like another five, 10 or 15 pounds on her back and the backs of her managers. The negative news and the prevailing malaise were getting to her, and to them. This general feeling that we can’t take on one more thing, not one more, is very real, and is creating havoc with our ability to cope with what would have been normal, everyday situations. So how are we to keep moving forward with a semblance of feelings of normalcy? We have to control the intake of information, and recognize the good that is still here in plenty. CM Julie Adamen is president of Adamen Inc., a consulting and placement firm specializing in the community management industry. She can be reached at julie@adamen-inc.com or through her Web site www.adamen-inc.com. Publisher’s Note: Julie Adamen, a nationally known author, publisher, speaker and educator in community management, will be returning to the chapter on Thursday, October 1 with her popular and timely program on management staffing. Find out how to motivate, build and support a cohesive management team in the face of current economic and industry challenges. See page 14 for program details. CONDO MEDIA • SEPTEMBER 2009 31

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Condo Media - September 2009

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