Condo Media - January 2010 - 42

LEGAL Note: Seeking a restraining order is not a hugely expensive undertaking. These cases are usually heard quickly and do not require extensive preparation or court time. They usually involve “hundreds” not “thousands” of dollars in court costs and legal fees. behavior. The board should then follow the steps outlined earlier for dealing with harassment against board members: • Have the board’s attorney send a letter to the offending owner describing the offending behavior and insisting that it must stop. • Impose sanctions if the behavior continues. • Offer to mediate the dispute or suggest that the owners seek third-party mediation services. • Seek a civil restraining order against the owner if the harassment continues. • Document all the intervention measures to demonstrate the board’s good faith efforts to deal with the problem. • Start by listening. Sometimes people simply need an opportunity to explain a problem or vent their frustration. • Remain professional. If the individual shouts at you, don’t shout back. If you mirror the abusive behavior, it will escalate. • Suggest an alternative. People often become frustrated because they feel powerless. Showing how they can solve a problem may ease the tension. • Respond to the problem. If you say you will obtain information or write a letter or make a decision, do so. • Enlist the help of other owners. Some of these measures will help with most owners, but, as noted earlier, if you’re dealing with chronic bullies, none of them will help. That’s where the last item on the list — getting other owners involved — comes in. The owners who disrupt meetings might ignore the president’s order to sit down, but they may well respond if five other owners repeat the command. The owner who shouts epithets at the board president or the manager in the parking lot will stop if other owners tell him that behavior won’t be tolerated. Bullies, by definition, won’t stand up to a crowd. Bullies thrive in society, as they do in homeowner associations, because people don’t want to get involved. But community association residents have more than the average power to control their destinies. For them, the question becomes: What kind of community do you want to live in — one that mirrors our uncivil society or one that provides a haven from it? CM Janet Aronson, Esq. is a partner in the law firm of Marcus, Errico, Emmer & Brooks PC. She is a frequent chapter speaker and author and serves on the CAI-NE Board of Directors. Owner vs. Owner When you are dealing with situations in which an owner is harassing another owner, the arguments for board intervention are a bit murkier, but may be even more compelling. The instinct is usually to let owners embroiled in personal conflicts work them out for themselves. But that theory could backfire and expose the association to serious liability if the harassment involves illegal discrimination based on race, sex, color, religion, national origin, marital status, or physical or mental handicap — all protected categories under federal and many state fair housing laws. Associations do have an affirmative obligation to intervene in these cases and could be charged with violating fair housing laws if they do not. One example: The former president of one community association, who was black, was persistently harassed by a neighbor, who was white. The harassment included threats to kill and rape the woman accompanied by vicious racial and sexual epithets. The woman filed suit against the board when it refused to intervene, and a District Court ruled that the board had the same obligation as a landlord in a rental building to protect residents from sexual and racial discrimination. The association eventually settled the case by paying the former president $550,000 and agreeing to purchase her condominium unit. Clearly, the stakes in these disputes can be high. When dealing with owner vs. owner harassment charges, the board should first verify the complaint — get copies of any abusive letters or e-mail messages or tapes of abusive phone calls. If the behavior occurs in person, have a third party, the manager or one or more board members, witness the threatening Essential Communication Skills Most of the advice we’ve discussed this far has focused on the legal or quasilegal steps boards can take to deal with harassment situations. Obviously, it would be far better to defuse tensions before they evolve into full-blown harassment problems. Effective communications skills can help. They aren’t a foolproof shield, but they are an effective first line of defense for the board members and managers whose positions require them to deal with angry owners. Some people are naturally effective communicators; they understand how to listen to angry people and respond without infuriating them further. Communications courses can teach those skills to people who don’t possess them. One of the most important things these courses teach is that while you can’t control another individual’s abusive behavior, you can control your response to it so you don’t make a tense situation worse. Other basic tips for dealing with angry or frustrated individuals: CONDO MEDIA • JANUARY 2010

Condo Media - January 2010

Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of Condo Media - January 2010