What Do I Do Now? - 133

133
AFTER /// CHAPTER 84
Who am I?
As a young person, you are probably just starting to gain a sense of
who you are, how you see yourself and how you want others to see
you. All of these things together make up your " identity. "
Perhaps before cancer, you thought your identity was pretty much
decided. Maybe you were the joker, the sporty one or the academic.
Your cancer diagnosis and treatment might have thrown a " fly in the
ointment. "
Changes in your appearance, body image and sexuality may have
impacted on your self-esteem and confidence.
Your role in the family, group of friends or romantic relationships
might be different.
You might feel more mature and stronger than before and think
different things are important now.
Even if you feel the same on the inside, people may have started to
treat you differently. Many young people find that " cancer " or " being
sick " starts to define their identity.
You may also wish that everyone would just treat you like before and
not single you out as different. It can help if you spend as much time
as possible doing the things you used to do - going to school or
work, meeting new people, dating and hanging out with people your
own age as much as possible.
Other young people find that they become used to their cancer
identity and the kindness and attention they receive. When your
treatment ends and the visible effects begin to fade, you may begin
to feel invisible and that no one seems to care anymore.
After cancer, it can take time to figure out a new identity - and while
you're working on it you might feel lost and confused for a while.
There are a lot of changes that come with the end of cancer
treatment. Everyone adjusts to this " new normal " differently. Learning
how to cope and manage your emotions and worries in this new
phase will take time. You have spent all of your treatment building
a relationship with your cancer care team and now you see them
much less. It's ok to have to relearn how to live life without constant
appointments and side effects interrupting.
Some common concerns among
survivors include:
» Financial stress
* Continue to work with a
social worker or financial
counselor at your place
of treatment to help you
navigate resources and ways
to get help managing your
bills and debt
» Psychosocial challenges
* Returning to work or school
- hello chemo-brain!
* Returning to family life at
home - adjusting to new/
old roles
* Addressing relationships
(existing and new) - Did you
lose friends? Gain some?
What about dating?
* Post-traumatic stress
disorder
Tools to help:
» Participating in a support group
or social networking with other
survivors has been found to be
beneficial
» Seeking support from a
counselor
Not all survivors experience all of
these effects and everyone's survivor
experience is different. If you are
having difficulty, please talk to your
doctor. There are strategies that
can help identify and manage the
physical and emotional effects of
your treatment. Remember that you
are not alone in what you are going
through. You have peers that you can
be connected to that know exactly
what it's like and you have friends
and loved ones that want to support
you however they can.
https://fwaya.org/
What Do I Do Now?

Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of What Do I Do Now?
