What Do I Do Now? - 88

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LIVE YOUR SOCIAL LIFE WITH CANCER /// CHAPTER 54
" How do I talk about this? "
Talk to Your Doctor About Intimacy
Prepare yourself for any physical changes during treatment by
having your doctor explain what these changes may be. During and
after treatment, inform your health care team about changes in
sexual health as they may be able to recommend options to reduce
discomfort. Treatment for sexual problems may include medications,
physical therapy, sexual health devices/products and/or individual/
relationship counseling. Don't be embarrassed. This is an important
part of your life that needs to be addressed and other people have
brought it up before you!
Talk with a therapist
For those that find things more difficult, a mental health provider
can help you cope with the physical and emotional trauma cancer
brings and determine how to move forward, whether with a partner
or looking for one. Look for a therapist with expertise in working with
people with cancer and/or sexual and relationship issues. Be sure to
talk to your doctor and ask for help finding a provider.
* The American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors
and Therapists has a searchable directory of sexual health
experts/counselors
Talk to Your Partner or Spouse
Starting the conversation. Many partners/spouses need reassurance
that the person with cancer still has an interest in being intimate, and
vice versa. Your partner may be concerned that expressing a wish to
be intimate again will be a source of stress and upset for both of you.
Be open about your thoughts and feelings so that you can send the
message to your partner that it's ok to talk about this.
» Be honest. Being upfront about your feelings can encourage your
partner to be honest about his or her feelings as well. Talk about
what feels good and what doesn't. Let your partner know if you're
tired or not feeling well. Good communication is an essential
part of any relationship, but it's especially important as you both
navigate the cancer experience.
» Talk about the physical closeness you need. Share how you feel
about your body. You may be self-conscious about a scar or you
may be coping with treatment side effects. Whatever your needs
are - whether you feel a need for physical affection, or whether
you are not yet interested in being physically intimate - let your
partner know. Your partner is most likely waiting for your signal to
know what to do, how to act, and what you need.
Find support and
information through
online resources
There are a number of online groups
that host discussion boards where
you can " talk " about concerns with
someone who has been there
» Will2Love is an online sexual selfhelp
program designed for cancer
survivors and partners.
» Relish is an app created to
improve intimate relationships
including text-based relationship
coaching
» The https://cancerdudes.org/
website has content about sex
and other topics that might
interest you.
» Read stories from Elephants
and Tea written by Sexuality
Columnist and survivor Marloe
Esch https://elephantsandtea.
com/author/marloe/
» For more information about
sexual problems during cancer
and treatment for men, visit
.https://www.cancer.gov/aboutcancer/treatment/side-effects/
sexuality-men

https://www.will2love.com/ https://www.hellorelish.com/ https://www.cancerdudes.org/ https://www.aasect.org/referral-directory https://www.aasect.org/referral-directory https://elephantsandtea https://www.cancer.gov/about-cancer/treatment/side-effects/sexuality-men https://www.cancer.gov/about-cancer/treatment/side-effects/sexuality-men https://www.cancer.gov/about-cancer/treatment/side-effects/sexuality-men https://fwaya.org/

What Do I Do Now?

Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of What Do I Do Now?