District Administration - August 2007 - (Page 56)

HUMOR Curriculum BY ODVARD EGIL DYRLI Saccharine Readers Children will love the cute and cuddly pretend-animals that skip, hop and cavort through each realistic tale. Prereaders will beg for more adventures of their “num-num pals” Honey-Bun, Yummy-Pie and Kissy-Poo. New Retch Classics Momma’s Earth Science Kits These handy elementary teaching kits contain class quantities of rock, sand, soil and water for hands-on manipulative activities. Shipping charges not included. Vincent Momma Quarries Innovative Fundraising Raise money for your district by selling greeting cards written in performance terms. Expected behaviors clearly identiﬁed for “happy birthday,” “get well” and “sympathy.” If you care enough to send a thought, it should be measurable! Edu-Greets Inc. Crate of the Month Club Twelve times a year you will receive an advance-notice postcard on an item of school equipment. If you do not want the item, simply return the card with the notarized signatures of all senior administrators within 24 hours. Or do nothing, and the selection will be trucked and billed to your district. Remember that our higher prices permit us to oﬀer our popular “Purchaser-Incentive Vacation Rewards.” Bryberry Brokers Inc. Handouts in a SackTM Get random selections of school-reform papers written by nontenured teacher education professors in every state. Material sold conveniently by the pound, so order as big a load as you need. Distribute by hand or mechanical spreader. Pedagogues Anonymous Bare-Naked Basics Own the deﬁnitive work on the semisubversive proposal to remove all references to “society” from schools. Dealing with reality limits learners to the realm of the possible, and also takes too much time. Let students ﬁnish school and ﬁnd out what’s what when it matters. Tran-Quill Ventures Backtrackle! Giant activity book shows how to turn real-world products into simple materials. Students will make birdfeeders into bleach bottles, and ﬂower vases into coﬀee cans and baby-food jars. Imagine the excitement when students bring home usable ice-cream sticks, toothpicks and shoe boxes they made themselves! Basic Backer & Company Aural Punctuation Teach young people to correct unbearable pauses in speech by using “spoken commas.” Replace embarrassing silences with active phrases such as “Y’know?” and “Right?” Try it: “I walked into class—y’know?— sat down—right? —opened my book bag—y’know?—got out a pen— right? —and …” It WORKS! Um/Er Associates 56 August 2007 District Administration

Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of District Administration - August 2007

Contents
Editor’s Letter
Letters
News Update
Technology Update
Curriculum Update
Inside the Law
Research Corner
Computer Literature
District Profile
Administrator Profile
Bus Money
DIBELS Draws Doers & Doubters
Report from EduComm 2007
Ins and Outs of Outsourcing
Curriculum Clearance
How Well Does This Web Site Work?
New Products
Problem Solution
Online Edge
Speaking Out
Professional Opinion
Calendar of Events
Understanding the Times

District Administration - August 2007