SEAHO Report - Spring 2011 - (Page 10)

H The Five Housing Love Languages seaHo rePort By Mark McNalley and Christopher Futch, Florida State University ow and in what ways do Housing administrators, professionals, and graduate students show their appreciation and support to students and student staff? Which responses do we most often employ, and which ones do we least demonstrate? How does the response of a supervisor differ from that of an advisor? These are the questions we asked ourselves in getting ready to submit a presentation proposal for SEAHO 2011. In discussing these questions with one another, our conversation moved toward Gary Chapman’s book the Five Love Languages. As both of us were recently married and had been in long term relationships, each of us had read this book. We wondered if the same love languages that Chapman applied to relationships and marriage could also be applied to Residence Life. From there, we set out on a quest to determine the five Housing love languages. From Chapman’s five love languages – words of affirmation, quality time, giving gifts, physical touch, and acts of services – we adapted them to a setting within Residence Life. In doing so, we came up with five Housing love languages that we felt sufficiently represented the range of an individual’s response to students and student staff – words of affirmation, common interests or being human, tangible recognition, expectations and evaluations, and increasing responsibility. Understanding the Housing Love Languages Words of Affirmation: Similar to the Love Languages used in Gary Chapman’s book, Words of Affirmation is having a conversation with your staff members and student leaders in order to affirm the decisions that they make, letting them know that you confirm and support their decision. A supervisor or advisor that uti- lizes Words of Affirmation is characterized by impactful, one-on-one meetings. A group that is supervised or advised by someone whose love language is Words of Affirmation would have no doubt as to how much they are appreciated because they are told that on a daily basis. When looking at the Words of Affirmation love language, dialects that are evident include how you affirm your first year staff members versus how you affirm your returning staff members, and how your love language allows the student organization you advise to either “sink” or “swim.” In terms of supervising, first year staff members will need more affirmation to let them know that they are doing what they are supposed to, while returning staff members will want affirmation that they are helping or mentoring the new staff properly. In terms of advising, there may be instances in which verbal affirmation may not be necessary. In this sense, an advisor allows the student organization to “sink” in order to help them learn the aspects contents reports news awards features regions

Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of SEAHO Report - Spring 2011

SEAHO Report - Spring 2011
Table of Contents
SEAHO President
One-on-Ones: Where Are They Headed?
The Five Housing Love Languages
Boys-To-Men Mentoring Program
2011 SEAHO Awards
Commuter Assistant Program
RoomBug at JMU
Residence Life Experience Transferred into Business Acumen
Fighting Committee Frustration
Virginia Tech: Ut Prosim
Seeing the Light: The Case for Fluorescent Bulbs in Residence Halls
Alabama Updates
Florida Updates
Kentucky Updates
Louisiana Updates
Mississippi Updates
North Carolina Updates
South Carolina Updates
Virginia Updates

SEAHO Report - Spring 2011