Training Industry Magazine - Summer 2023 - 21

FROM CRITICISM TO CATALYSTS:
5 STEPS TO EMPOWER YOUR FEEDBACK
BY RACHAEL PEMBERTON-BAGHURST
Constructive feedback is a powerful tool
for improving performance, enhancing
relationships and achieving more
together. Giving positive feedback is a
joy, but it can be much more challenging
to deliver feedback on something that
has gone badly. Most people giving
feedback fall into traps - either they
are eye-wateringly direct and provoke
defensive behaviors, or very indirect and
create confusion through their mumbling
through an apologetic frown. In this
article, we will explore the five steps to
giving constructive feedback and how
it can positively impact personal and
professional relationships.
1. Prepare, Prepare, Prepare
Firstly, consider the practicalities of
when and how you will deliver the
feedback - ensure a private space
is available and that enough time is
allowed to deliver and discuss the
feedback, answer any questions and
agree on a way forward. Consider
the furniture layout and formality, and
how it mirrors the significance of the
feedback and your communication
norms - sitting opposite ends could
suggest opposition, a table could be
considered a barrier and giving people a
view of the exit could prevent them from
feeling trapped. Ensure there is enough
space between both parties - being
too close could signal aggression or
dominance, but being too distant could
make the conversation seem unduly
formal or suggest a lack of interest. If
you are having the conversation using
video conferencing, then make sure
that it feels as invested in as a face-toface
meeting.
GIVING POSITIVE
FEEDBACK IS A JOY,
BUT IT CAN BE
MUCH MORE CHALLENGING TO
DELIVER FEEDBACK
ON SOMETHING
THAT HAS GONE BADLY.
Body language accounts for a huge
proportion of our communication; so
use this to your advantage. We might
consciously tell ourselves not to fold
our arms or avoid eye contact, but
we might be less aware of distracting
habits we have picked up such as
clicking pens, foot tapping or loudly
TRAINING INDUSTRY MAGAZINE - SUMMER 2023 I WWW.TRAININGINDUSTRY.COM/MAGAZINE
chewing gum. Recording yourself can
be especially useful, even if it is painful
to watch at first.
Before launching straight into the
conversation, prepare the recipient with
a micro-yes. This is a short but important
question for two reasons. Firstly, it is a
pacing tool that gets their brain into a
feedback-ready state, and secondly,
it
gives them a feeling of autonomy and
control that increases their buy-in. This
question can be as simple as " I have
some feedback for you - can I share
this with you? " This both lets them
prepare and also gives them a feeling of
autonomy. By agreeing, they are giving
you permission to begin and buying into
the conversation.
2. State Your Situational
Evidence
State what happened clearly and
neutrally, firmly concentrating on the
behavior, not the person. When our
self-concept is under attack, people
tend to get defensive and make the
person giving the feedback the villain,
letting themselves off the hook for their
performance. They also may indulge in
blaming or justifying behaviors, both of
which are unhelpful for improvement.
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