Cooperative Living June 2018 - 42

Rural Living | by Margo Oxendine, Contributing Columnist
Pieces of Springtime:
Lavender Dust Bunnies,
Scary Handymen on the Prowl
A
s I write this in late April, spring
seems to finally be springing. We
didn't have much snow at all until
10 inches fell several times after the
calendar told us it was spring. In fact, this
year in Bath County, there was snow in the
air later than I've ever seen it (and you
know I keep track!): April 19. That's a
little too late, even for me.
After that, we were plagued with heavy,
almost scary rains and wind. At least, we
didn't experience another derecho. One of
those in a lifetime is quite enough. It was
nice to see the raging waterfall, and the
rushing rivers and creeks. As long as they
weren't in my yard.
This week, though, the birds are swooping
around everywhere, looking for mates and
checking out the real estate. I noticed several
pairs of birds - sparrows, wrens, and maybe
thrushes - poking around under fallen
leaves (no, I never got around to raking),
looking for something. I'm not sure, but I
guess they were seeking building materials
for their nests. I happily obliged by emptying
the waste basket next to my dryer. I went
outside and parsed out drifts of lavender
dryer lint everywhere. I don't know why my
dryer lint is always lavender; maybe I have
too much pink and purple? Not a bad thing.
Not only is my yard dotted with lavender
dust bunnies, there are also some tasty tidbits
out there: The tiny broken tails of pretzels,
some stale crumbled shredded wheat, a couple
cut-up wrinkled apples. These are almost
always gone the next morning when I check.
I'm glad I live up here where no one ever
just " stops by. " (My rutted driveway
precludes that, as do those awful thorny
multiflora rose branches. My sister now
refuses to come to my house; I must meet
her at the end of the driveway, if we're
going anywhere together.)
Soon enough, it will be time for my yard
man to begin his mowing and weed-eating.
He promises to take a chainsaw to the thorny
40 | Cooperative Living | June 2018
holes with earrings; shaved head; lots of
tattoos, including on the neck (a pretty
sure sign). He was twitchy, too.
He wanted me to hire him for yard work.
" I'll do anything, " he said. " I'll just bet you
would, " I thought.
I told him I already had someone. What
I should have said is, " Oh, my friend on
the drug task force is doing it. " He'd have
skedaddled, is my guess.
Instead, he kept hanging around,
yammering. He pulled out his phone and
showed me photos of his son. " I've got an
appointment, " I said. " Sorry I can't help you,
Imagine my confirmed suspicion to discover
he has a record of 22 criminal convictions!
I reported the incident to one of my
favorite deputies. He knew who the fellow
was, right away. " Keep him off your
property, " he said. " Call us if he comes
back. " I plan to. Around here, we don't all
always lock all our doors. But I'm sure
doing that now. 
To read more of Margo's columns,
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Call 540-468-2147 Mon.-Thurs., 9-5,
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www.co-opliving.com
roses. There's nothing to be done about the
driveway, unless I want to spend at least a
thousand dollars, so visitors: Beware, and
just live with it. Or not.
I did have a rare knock on my door one
morning recently. I was still in my pajamas,
but " presentable, " I presumed. He knocked
on the front door, which no one does. I'm
not tall enough to see out the decorative
window, so I opened it.
Now: I cover criminal court cases all the
time. I love it, but believe me, I'm aware of
what a convicted felon often looks like. This
fellow checked all the boxes: Huge button
but thanks so much. " Then, I asked for his
business card, knowing he wouldn't have one.
He gave me his name and phone number.
Finally, he inquired, " Do you mind if I
come in and use your bathroom? "
Aha! There it was: This " friendly " fellow's
chance to get inside my house and check
out my possessions and medicine cabinets!
Fat chance, buster. " No, I'm sorry, " I
said. " I'm still in my pajamas, and I don't
know you. " I suggested he " go " behind his
car, which I noted the make and model of.
As soon as he'd gone, I came in here and
looked him up on the circuit court website.
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Cooperative Living June 2018

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